Widow for a Season: Finding
Your Identity in Christ
Chapter Three: Lost to be
Having a God-centered perspective requires us to look down from the mind
of God instead of up from human experience.
God has given us the tools to do this through His Word.
In this chapter we will examine Isaiah 54:5 as well as many directives
from the Old and New Testament concerning Godís heart for the widow.
A widow must begin to define herself as God defines her.
We will consider the relationship that God has personally established
with her as Husband to the widow, and Father to her fatherless children.
We will look at related Biblical Jewish traditions, the responsibilities
of extended family, directives given to the early church, and responsibility of
the church today. We will learn what it means to believe God beyond believing in
Three - Lost
to Be Found
You are where you are by Godís permission and even though He had the
ability to prevent this from happening to you, He didnít.
my husband died, I remember thinking, ďI am a strong woman of God. I
will eventually get over this. Someday this will be my past and not my
present.Ē But that just isnít so. Like everything else we
encounter in life, our experiences will always remain with us to some
degree because they are a marker of change and new identity that is forged
by the Potter as He works at the clay.
is faithful to His purposes and finishes all that He begins. Jeremiah
29:11-14 in the King James Version has become the guiding Scripture for my
life. ďFor I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the Lord,
thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end. Then
shall ye call upon me, and ye shall go and pray unto me, and I will
hearken unto you. And ye shall seek me, and find me, when ye shall search
for me with all your heart. And I will be found of you, saith the Lord.Ē
the initial stages of my widowhood I began to realize that I was
desperately ignorant of the promises of God. How would I know what to
trust God with if I didnít know His promises?
Itís not that I didnít read my Bible, but I didnít know the
importance of identifying and committing the promises to heart and mind.
Without knowing what God had promised, I was taking responsibility
for what He had identified as His.
Itís clear that God was busy at work. His intention to provide
had been set in motion years before. Now that I know them, the precious
promises of God bring hope to my day.
my breastfeeding illustration I said that the truth had empowered me. That
is true, but initially it knocked me off my feet. The Lord began almost
immediately to use certain people in my life. One of my good friends lost
her husband about nine months after I lost mine, and our lives tragically
collided. Then the Lord brought me into a circle of several other widows
who were a bit further along in their recovery. I was driven to know their
journey and how long it would take for me to be whole again. I was looking
for a magical and quick formula to recovery.
My friend and I sat down with one woman who had been widowed for ten
years. I will never forget hearing her say that she finally began living
after the eighth year. Another widow told us that in the four years she
had been a widow the fourth was the worst. These were crushing blows to my
belief that I could easily get back on track. I just wanted everything to
be normal again! I have always been an overcomer. I take whatís wrong
and make it right. Iím the one who makes lemonade out of the lemons in
life. For the first time, though, I was beginning to think that maybe I
couldnít pull it off. That
is exactly what God wanted. He
wanted me to realize that I could never do it by myself. The faith that
had always worked for me was crumbling for the sake of a greater, more